Enter each relationship with a blank slate.
In Freshmen Fifteen, after her breakup with her high school boyfriend, Laila is skeptical of every guy who comes her way. But unlike real life, Romance novels are filled with happy endings and Laila will ultimately have a happy ending.
Real life has many more ups and downs, twists and turns than Romance novels. Fortunately, with each relationship we have the opportunity to learn about ourselves because a relationship is like a mirror it will reflect our good and bad habits. During a relationship we also have the opportunity to learn our likes and dislikes, and things we would love for our long-time partner to exhibit, or things we’d like them to never do… ever.
One thing we must not do in a relationship is allow the negative situations, or circumstances to build an impenetrable wall around our heart. When we move on from one relationship, we cannot let the negative things of the past relationship keep us from trusting the next person.
Yes, learn and grow from all situations — negative or not. Don’t be naive and repeat your past. Grow wiser, but with wisdom understand that not everyone is the same. The next guy, or girl, will not treat you exactly the way your ex did. The next relationship will not have the same ups and downs. Not to say, you won’t have ups and downs, but let them be unique to that relationship.
You can’t start off a new relationship with ‘Well my ex would do this…” Clear out your luggage, and allow the new guy, or girl, to fill it up with their own mistakes.